Sometimes I feel like I'm a superhero, like I'm the Natasha Romanoff of my life. Able to do everything, to know everything, and to always be on my A-game. But the reality of it is that sometimes I'm a lot more like Steve Rogers -- one person who has so much goodness and ambition, but keeps going stubbornly even when things don't always work how I want them to.
At twenty-two I'm currently a full-time student, a full-time blogger, a part-time retail employee, and a part-time freelancer. That doesn't count being a friend, a daughter, or who I am outside of all of those things. And at the end of the day, it's a lot of hats to wear. School itself is a full-time job, claiming 30-70 hours per week, depending on how much I have going on in my classes at the moment. I work retail anywhere from 5-15 hours per week right now because of my school schedule. My freelancing fluctuates every week with the needs of my clients. Blogging can take anywhere from 10-30 hours per week, depending.
On the surface it can all seem easy.
I'm making good grades in my classes so far, I make it to every shift I'm scheduled, I get all of my client's work done, and I'm always working on this space, even if I don't post for days at a time.
But I can assure you, it's not.
There are weeks where I'm barely meeting deadlines, nights where I sleep less than five hours, days where I sleep until three in the afternoon, times I forget to eat lunch or dinner until eleven at night, days where I do nothing but watch things on Netflix or reread a favorite book, pretending like I don't have obligations to meet soon.
On the other side, there are days where I knock everything out earlier than needed, where my life feels balanced and productive and everything works.
As I learn how to be a student, a blogger, a freelancer, a retail worker, and a person all at once, the balanced days become more frequent. But not every day is balanced. And that's okay.
Because, at the end of the day, I have to remember that I'm a person, and there is only so much I can do in twenty-four hours. Instead of beating myself up about not getting enough done, I choose to forgive myself and start fresh the next morning. What's done is done, and the best thing I can do is focus on what I did accomplish instead of what I didn't.
Image from Death to the Stock Photo